Recently I’ve been posting informal survey questions in Facebook, just for fun. My diverse and creative friends never cease to make it interesting with their responses. Today I asked them to finish the phrase: “if I had one day to do anything I wanted to without fear, I would ___________.” I must admit I was surprised by the answers.
Many people simply wanted to take a cross-country trip they have dreamed about. The fear in that (I guess) is in everything falling apart at home if they headed out on the open road. A few daredevils wanted to jump out of planes, rob casinos or leave an impression on the White House lawn. Something about 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue makes folks want to act out.
By far my favorite comment came from my friend Baruch, who said, “I would simply enjoy myself… without having to worry about a stock market crash, double-dip recession, nuclear Iran, chances of being diagnosed with cancer, or that something will happen to my kids. Give me a day without fear, and I will give you pure joy.” Now that’s a refreshing attitude. You are granted one day completely without fear… and instead of taking a risk, you just sit and enjoy the peace of mind.
Living with some fear can be healthy. Fear keeps us vigilant and aware of potential threats we should defend ourselves from, but it can be crippling if it takes over your life. While completely eliminating fear may be impossible, overcoming irrational fear with courage and faith must certainly be within our control.
Take another look at that dream that fear has so far kept out of your reach. If you could set aside your fear for just one day, would you get started? Can you imagine the peace of mind and sense of fulfillment after you achieve it?
Every day is a day I live without fear.
After more than 20 deaths in my life (family, friends and colleagues), I learned a long time ago how short life is.
My parents were living examples having to live in the Internment Camps and they passed along this to all of us kids. If you’re living in an internment camp behind barbed wire, with the possibility of dying at any moment, you face racial discrimination and have been betrayed by your own country you were born in as a U.S. Citizen… well, you just live each day and are grateful to be alive.
It is this philosophy, my parents were living examples of living without fear. I learned that if you’re not living each day as if it were your last, you’re just simply not living.
None of us are immune to the inevitable and the lesson is about living life to the fullest and taking it every breath with gratitude.
If not conquered, fear leads to the worst emotion of all…regret!
If I’m fortunate enough to live a long life, and I’m fortunate enough to see the events of my entire life as I’m passing away peacefully; looking back on my life, I don’t want to be overwhelmed with a feeling of regret. I don’t want to look back and think “why didn’t I do…?” or “I should have…”
I want to look back on my life and say “WOW…what a ride!”
Aggressively conquer your fears, because Regret weighs a ton on your soul!
Yesterday, I had dinner with a woman who 20 years ago, seven months pregnant and with $50 in her pocket, boarded a plane alone to start a new life in Canada. Fearless and inspiring.
Wow, that is really fearless! It´s one year later now and I hope it all went good for her 🙂
Dave, I just attended a workshop this past week on meditation and its use in psychotherapy. One of the speakers was a buddist monk from Sri Lanka. Their secret to living without fear is to “Desire Nothing, be satisfied with what you have.” He said desire is the culprit to our peace of mind.
He encouraged us to seek a simple life. I have been told that by another monk many years ago from Tibet. According to him, If we have nothing we aren’t afraid to lose it.
I realize our culture would not embrace this principle, but maybe giving ourselves permission to be satisfied once in a while would be a good thing.
Patricia
David, another well-written meaningful and thought provoking blog! I loved Patricia’s comment too, as we have so much and people still aren’t satisfied. How sad.
I still have a question posed by fellow Toastmaster Fred posted to my bulletin board: “What would I do if I wasn’t afraid.” It helps me shake the self-doubt that sometimes enters my sphere which can ruin a minute, a few hours or even a day if you let it!
Thanks for sharing and providing yet another interesting and relevant blog.
Happy Writing!
Karen
This is really meaningful thought, Atleast we should try to minimize our Desires in order to maximize fearlessness and peace of mind.
Very good point Srini! If we can “not want” so much, it removes much of the expectations that cause disappointment.